Reflection of an Icon, and Their Inspiration for Me
Happy Holidays everyone, and Happy Birthday to Dick Van Dyke!
The Hollywood legend turned 100 on December 13, 2025 - and his life story is one that I can take inspiration from on my life moving forward.
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Dick Van Dyke is a phenomenal actor, comedian, singer, and dancer of the TV Golden Age, AND he's still up and about, making life his own, at 100 years old.
How the heck does that man do it?
I imagine how hard it must be to get up everyday, and make life happen when your body has other ideas. I struggle with mental issues - I can't imagine physical issues at this time.
But as this man's birthday rolled around, I did some research to see how he keeps going, and let me tell you: the man has earned my respect when it comes to living life.
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I looked up a few articles that talked about Dick's life; they're listed here as reference material:
https://people.com/dick-van-dyke-made-it-100-by-giving-up-alcohol-and-cigarettes-11862068
https://www.today.com/health/aging/dick-van-dyke-health-rcna170836
There are three things/categories he has stated for the reason he has lived so long - and I'm eager to find ways to apply what he has done in my life.
Starting with quitting bad habits:
Dick Van Dyke moved to California and found work in Hollywood - and also addiction. He became an avid drinker and smoker due to the influence of his new friends, where at one time, he would only occasionally drink. Later in his life, around 50 years old, he would understand that he has an Addictive Personality: At a Vandy High Tea event hosted in his home, Dick was recorded by People magazine as saying (in reference to his Addictive Personality); "If I liked something, I was going to overdo it."
It is reported that Dick checked into a hospital to address his alcoholism in the 70's, and afterwards went through the grueling process of quitting smoking. In his words, quitting cigarettes was "Twice as hard"; "Much worse than the alcohol," also stating that this process took "forever" (People.com, 2025).
What were his reasons for quitting?
"A friend once warned him about his drinking habits, but Van Dyke shrugged him off, he told Dick Cavett (another reporter). Van Dyke estimates that he drank heavily for about seven years. So, by the time he realized he needed help, he was in too deep and had to work at his recovery for many years (TODAY.com, 2024).
Dick Van Dyke has been alcohol-free for decades, due to his personal dedication, and does not miss drinking.
Even if it's not explicitly stated, I am assuming an influence for his decision to stop smoking started with Walt Disney passing away from Lung Cancer: "[Disney] was a wonderful guy. He just smoked too much!"(People.com, 2025). Still, to this day, Van Dyke has stated that he still chews nicotine gum, proving he continues to struggle with nicotine addiction.
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The second thing Dick Van Dyke does is go to the gym:
There's a famous captioned picture of the legend with this mantra he has apparently stated: "In my 30s, I exercised to look good. In my 50s, to stay fit. In my 70s, to stay ambulatory. In my 80s, to avoid assisted living. Now, in my 90s, I'm just doing it of pure defiance."
Van Dyke is known for his dancing, but there are no sources I have found that say he developed the talent in his youth. It seems he showed up as a new talent in his thirties, appearing as Albert Peterson, in the musical show "Bye Bye Birdie". But he hasn't stopped dancing since.
And working out is the main reason why.
He has been stated as a regular gym visitor, hitting the equipment 3 times a week: "I don’t know why this is something I still want to do, but it is," Van Dyke recently wrote for The Times UK, "I’m not a ‘wake up and go back to bed’ type just yet, unless it’s cold and rainy. If I miss too many gym days, I really can feel it — a stiffness creeping in here and there. If I let that set in, well, God help me."
"At the gym, I usually do a circuit, going from one machine to the next without a break, in a circle," he continued. "I start with the sit-up machine. Arlene [his wife] says I could do 500, but that might be exaggerating. Then I do all the leg machines religiously because my legs are two of my most cherished possessions. And then the upper body."
"The secret ingredient is the music. Most of my humming and singing really happens when I’m going from one machine to another. By ‘going’ I mean dancing. You heard me — dancing! And if I’m really feeling it, I’m no quiet warbler; I’m a Broadway belter."
"By the end I’m in a sweaty rush, the blood flowing from fingertips to toes, and my spirits are soaring," (TheTimes.co.uk, 2025).
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The third thing he does, is two sides of the same coin:
First, Dick Van Dyke rejects hard feelings, and second, he continually seeks love and positivity.
"I’ve always thought that anger is one thing that eats up a person’s insides — and hate. And I never really was able to work up a feeling of hate. I think that is one of the chief things that kept me going,” And: "Sometimes I have more energy than others — but I never wake up in a bad mood,” (People.com, 2025)
This doesn't stop him from laughing at himself, and with others: Dick is an unapologetic prankster, and has stated that he has to "Scratch that itch" every so often (TheTimes.co.uk, 2025).
Dick Van Dyke met his wife Arlene in Hollywood in 2006. According to his UK Times article, they fell in love quickly, and married soon after.
"Without question, our ongoing romance is the most important reason I have not withered away into a hermetic grouch. Arlene is half my age, and she makes me feel somewhere between two thirds and three quarters my age, which is still saying a lot. Every day she finds a new way to keep me up and moving, bright and hopeful and needed."
Van Dyke also shared that along with dancing, he sings as part of an a cappella group. The group has many people much younger than himself, but the group continues to book gigs, and the activity keeps Dick feeling alive, because it's an activity that he loves doing (TheTimes.co.uk, 2025).
"Boiled down, the things that have kept my life joyful and fulfilling are pretty simple: romance, doing what I love and a whole lot of laughing. Let me show you what that looks like on the ground, as they say. To pull the “grumpy old man” away from the TV, Arlene will dance along to the pharmaceutical ads. This gets me out of bed, following her to the kitchen. Invariably, one of us will start singing and the other will join in. And if it’s a good day, which it almost always is in our house, we’ll break into a little swaying and soft-shoe right there." (TheTimes.co.uk, 2025)
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There is so much to learn from this man.
I grew up watching "Mary Poppins" and "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang" and he always appeared to be a guy with boundless energy and optimism. His slapstick was also fun to watch, (although not as good as Jerry Lewis, in my humble opinion) he just seemed so determined to make people smile - just watch this clip of "Put On a Happy Face": https://youtu.be/I_CE7GqqrvY?si=7jWmCATN4gulOZFN
So I'm going to use what his life has taught me to make small changes in my life.
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I took some personal time while forming this post, and wrote out some thoughts about what is preventing me from being happy - why I feel so stuck where I am right now. And the first thing I need to do, is let go of bad habits.
I still feel shame and guilt about who I am as a person: I'm talented, sometimes happy, hardly satisfied, stubborn, tired, and imperfect.
All my progress in healing from emotional and mental trauma has given me peace, and some happiness, yet, I still have moments where I feel VERY far from where I want to be.
I'm free from my mom - but I don't feel free from myself.
So I've identified a few things I specifically want to let go of moving forward:
A) Perfection: I thought I had moved on from this, but I don't think I've moved away from it as much as I initially believed. These are the real truths:
"Life is imperfect, that's the rule of mortal life. And in imperfection, there is so much beauty."
"Through imperfect action, beauty can be found."
"I am imperfect, and as a result, I am beautiful."
I truly hate typing all that.
One day, I hope I can fully accept those lines and truly believe them. Right now, I just feel sick reading them, because for a long time, I've relied on Perfection to protect me:
"If I can be perfect, then X will or won't happen to me".
Logic can be flawed, and obviously, my trauma brain has formed an untrue logic.
Sometimes things will or will not happen to you even if you try to be perfect. So maybe instead of getting mad when your flawed logic fails, maybe just accept that you are not perfect - that life is not perfect - and you might be more at peace. Find more laughter. Find more happiness.
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B) Satisfaction: I constantly feel like my current circumstances don't match what I believe I deserve.
I am intelligent and capable, yet no one will give me a job.
I am good at my hobbies, yet I don't have my own money to do ALL the hobbies I want at any given time. Also, I'm not perfect at doing them.
I want to craft, but I don't have the space or even a place in my home to do those things.
I am completely unsatisfied by current circumstances and somehow, instead of inspiring me to do something about it, it makes me want to curl up in a ball and die.
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I had some time to reflect on WHY I feel this way; and I think I know why now:
As a child, I created a defense mechanism against my mom: don't do anything, because you are far less likely to run into an emotional "bomb" that way.
I've done a lot of work to combat that - it also helps that I'm currently not speaking with my mom. I no longer have to fear for a "bomb" going off.
Being unsatisfied, unfortunately, leaves me feeling powerless. Shame and guilt should inspire people to change. And I have done some progress on that - but it largely feels slow, with not much to show for it. :/
And that painful, slow, and unrewarding state of being makes me want to protect myself.
"Don't do anything so that you are less likely to feel that burn."
Sounds painfully similar to what I taught myself as a child to do. :/
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"Not being where I want to be is not failure - it's progress."
"I am in the middle of progress."
"And it's ok to be in the middle of progress, as long as you keep moving."
I thought for a long time that progress was fine as long as I kept moving forward.
And when I wasn't moving forward, I felt disappointed in myself. And then I would just stop moving - to protect myself from disappointment.
But regression is part of the healing process - I need to allow myself movement, regardless of the direction, because being stagnant was what made me have so many problems that I have been addressing in the first place!
I can't bully myself into becoming a better person, I need grace and compassion.
And it has to come from me.
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I feel like these are the two biggest and baddest habits to get rid of - these thoughts are no longer suiting me. And instead of figuring this out MONTHS ago, I curled up into a ball and stopped moving.
No more!
I'm going to find ways to get myself moving. I'm changing my inner dialogue so that it allows more grace. I've been actively looking for beauty in imperfect things, and finding ways to appreciate them for what they are.
And the foundation for this, is in going to the gym - which I will be talking about next time.
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Thank you so much for reading, and I truly hope your holidays are wonderful.
Leave comment if you feel similarly to what I'm going through, because I want to believe I'm not the only one who struggles with imperfection and dissatisfaction. Or, comment about how awesome Dick Van Dyke's life is - he truly is an inspiration to me, and I hope he can be that for you too!
Until next time!
XOXOX
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